it's not life that matters but the journey...

this is old news by now, but I just had to say something!  I'm appalled.  I mean, what's up with this?:

I really had meant to write one more post on here the other day, which was Saturday, but now its the end of Monday and I still haven't updated.  I just  haven't felt inspired I guess...

this morning was just so so crappy... and I guess it all started when M brought in the sign that has been advertising our school (in front of the house).  He said that if I am planning to return to the U.S., he doesn't  see the point of keeping the sign out there.  I agree, because as it is, I am really worried about telling my current 7 students (plus Noriko and the kids in Shimizu) that I am leaving.  But things have just come to a point that I can't stay here anymore, regardless of how much I love these students...  Nonetheless, seeing that sign come in just brought everything into that inevitable point of reality that I've been avoiding.  Thus, I have been very depressed all day.

I had planned to go for a walk this morning, but I couldn't leave the house when I was crying, so I called my sister.  Thank goodness she was home, cause she made everything all better... she's the most wonderful sister, and the best person at giving advice, and at making me feel good about myself (which I need these days).  she told me just what I needed to hear, so I am feeling much more empowered now.  Thank you Allison!

I did go for that walk this afternoon, and stopped at the convenience store to buy, among many other things, chocolate.  It helped a bit, but I wish I was anywhere but here right now...